Dating Forums

[lamartine]

i need some help. i haven't seen him in a month, but he still calls almost every day. we talk, sometimes for an hour at a time and sometimes about very personal things.

last night, we talked for an hour. i told him things i probably shouldn't have, like that i am struggling alot at school right now because of an anxiety problem that was severely aggravated by this break up. and he told me something really personal also--that his parents had a huge fight this weekend and that his mom may have asked for a divorce but that he had heard this all second hand from his sisters and hadn't gone home to check on his parents. he also told me that he thought his mom was crazy.

i asked him is he missed seeing me and if i was ever going to actually see him in person again. he said yes on both counts. he said he wished he had me with him right then but that you can't always get what you want.

what is going on? i still want to be with him so badly. i hurt all the time because of this. why would he still be calling me? does this denote interest or just maybe that he's using me for compnay/ a crutch while he looks for someone else? i am so confused. i have never broken up with someone before only to maintain this level of contact.

[SFguy]

who broke up with who, and why?

[sungirl]

yeah depending on who broke up with who would explain more

[lamartine]

well, it's kind of complicated. we went on a ski trip together a month ago, and we didn't get along well on the trip. he felt like i was pressuring him to make the relationship more serious than he wanted it to be. we had a huge fight the last night and decided to take a break. two days later, i called and left a message breaking up with him. two days after that, he called, and we decided again to give it a shot. he made me a beautiful dinner that week, and we had a great date, but he told me he thought we shouldn't have sex anymore because he wasn't sure about the relationship. then, for like two weeks he would call but didn't want to see me. i was going away for a week, and so i asked to see him, and he still didn't want to see me, and that's when we broke up. technically, it was my decision, but it was really more him. he was pushing me away, and he wanted to make all the decisions about when and if we saw each other and when and if we had sex. i wish i had waited it out, but it seemed pointless to continue seeing someone who only wanted to see me once every few weeks even though he didn't really have anything else to do. still, i feel like he broke up with me. he was the one expressing all the uncertainty and placing the boundaries on the relationship.

[SFguy]

Hard to tell, he either just wants to be friends or is stringing you along in case it doesn't work out with another girl he may be with

[lamartine]

can guys really do that, just switch modes from being a boyfriend to being a friend like that? do you think there's any way that it means that he's still interested in me?

[SFguy]

yes guys can switch really easily, especially if thet are interested in another girl

[HottGirl]

You need to ignore him for a while, ignoring him may get him intereested again, guys are weird like that

[lamartine]

oh man. he called last night at 6:30 and asked me to come have dinner with him an hour and a half away. i told him the truth, which was that i had a date, and i haven't heard from him today. did i ruin my chances?

[ItalianStallion]

I was in the same boat as you literally, except im a guy and it was a girl who did that to me, we were doing real good and seeing each other all the time and then she pushed me away and only wanted to see me like once every week or 2, and she would put stuff like getting her nails done or going to the tanning bed over seeing me, yea so we definately are not together anymore, even though i stuck by her side through everything.

[lamartine]

italian stallion--what finally happened between you and your girl?

[Joanne]

What I know this kind of guy is having another love stories, so he might have another / other girl in his life now, but he won't leave you because I think when he's feel bored with another girl he can go to you and when he's already feel bored with you then he go back to another girl so I think just like his toys and I bet he is good looking guy and good on bed, which you can't loose him so bad .


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[ItalianStallion]

Lamartine - We ended up breaking everything off, i ended up not picking up her calls for a while and dodging her because i just couldnt deal with it, once i got over it i started talking to her again occasionally like online or every now and then she would call and i would pick it up, i never called her though. As of lately she has been calling me a lot like 4 days out of the week almost and ive been picking it when i can. I still am not fully over her and I dont know if this is her trying to come back to me but as hard as it is I would never go back to her just because of how much she hurt me and in my mind if someone doesnt want me at certain point of time but does later, they arent worth it, you are probably a great girl and this guy just doesnt see that, maybe after you guys broke it off he couldnt pick up any girls and felt regretful, who knows, just make sure you think everything out real well before you make any decisions.

[trishmcg]

Look, breaking up can be tough but it should not be the end of the world for you. There lots of men to see and meet. Instead of crying your heart out, try to look for a guy who won't let you cry no more. Try going to (scamming dating site). There are lots of guys there (just don't date the ones I'm dating ) I'm sure you'll find one there.

[vanessabg]

[quote="SFguy"]who broke up with who, and why?[/quote]
Yes i am agree to "SFguy" depending on who broke up who? Totally confusion,