Dating Forums

[lollypop_x]

Ok, here it goes. I was a guy that was totally not interested in starting a new relationship; i turned down every girl, cute or not. then my best friends gets a girlfriend... we still hung out so it was cool; then he decides to get ingaged a few months later, and we barely hung out anymore. Then, soon after, I met this girl just this past august of last year. she just moved in across the street with her sister and brother-in-law in May. One day they invite me over for a party and its when i meet her. she flirts alot with me and so i flirt back. I ask her to go hang out a few days later and we have a good time. at first, i didnt know if i really liked her enough to wanna start a relationship with her, but after a week or two, i decide i want to. So i stay over late one night and we make out and talk about startin the relationship, including her concerns bout us bein just soo close, across the street. i thought it was great!!?

after the first few weeks, she starts gettin alil distant with me, and she doesnt want to kiss me anymore and pushes me away. Im confused and such, and so i figured maybe she's lost interest in me. I also noticed that she is online alot on myspace, and whenever i come into the house, she gets off really quick. she even once got mad at me for goin to her room while she was on the computer when told me not to go over there. It comes clear to me a few days after when we are talkin outside and she gets a fone call from some guy. She didnt know who the guy was at first, and when she finally remembers him, she starts talkin to him and me at the same time. she barely knows the guy on the phone, and asks him stuff like 'didnt you go into the army or somethin?' and stuff like that. at that point, i feel stupid and i leave, and i dont talk to her anymore. she then keeps emailing me and calling me like as if nothing happened. i finally talk to her and she expains that the guy was just an old friend. i figured i got no hard proof so i give this thing another try.

the relationship goes on, we quarreled alot, especially about her being so racist, yet im a different nationality (hipocracy). and in november, i bring up the fact that i wanted the relationship to move up a level. it felt alot like just a friendship; we barely made out, and we've never had sex or anything. I mean, i understand that if she isnt ready, its cool; but she gives the excuse that she doesnt trust me. its been like 3 months?? i felt that if she didnt trust me, then the relationship couldnt go on. i didnt want to sound like a pig, but i happen to think intimacy is also important. so she tells me that i should wait, and that she just isnt ready, and we go on. in january the relationship is still the same, untill i flip out one day and get really mad cuz i wass soo busy with work and school and didnt have time to fight, and i wasnt happy with the progress of the relationship; so i break it off with her, and it becomes mutual. of course, a week later, i talk to her sister and she tells me its cuz we juss saw eachother too often; 4-5 times a week was too much; so i agreed and admitted it was my fault for comin over too often. we then try to be friends, and then we hang out alot for a few weeks and i tell her i want us to be back together, and then we make out and stuff.

at this point it is the best time in our relationship now. we get along very well, we text eachother every day and end them with 'lots of love', and we see eachother 2-3 times a week. then one week, i get really busy, and i go to her house to pick up somethin, and she becomes distant again. so then i chill there and we talk later at night. she tells me that she doesnt want to see me as often and clarifies that we are still just friends... ??? i just sunk it in and went to sleep. the mornin comes and she texts me and starts this huge drama, and blames me for starting it because i got upset?? dont i have the right to be? am i wrong for thinkin we were datin again? is she just playin with me? or wot the heck is goin on? now she tells me that im overreacting and that all she wanted was to see eachother less and thats it... is it just me overreacting? or does it sound like shes tryin to keep me on a leash and talk to other guys at the same time? i also keep thinkin she likes me, but she's ashamed of bein with me, cuz im a different nationality??? i dont know anymore.

[SFguy]

There's no doubt that she does not want a relationship with you, so if that's what you want you should cut her off, I think you should cut her off no matter what, she's playing with you, she knows you like her more than she likes you, move on, life would be better not dealing with her